Minor League Baseball’s All-Name Team

Jul 24, 2013; Anaheim, CA, USA; General view of the ball on the pitchers mound before the start of the game between the Los Angeles Angels and the Minnesota Twins at Angel Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Jayne Kamin-Oncea-USA TODAY Sports

Minor League Baseball does it’s Moniker Madness every year, and it is always a great follow, but it just ranks names and never takes into account the position they play. So I have decided to put together my five man pitching staff, a full infield, and outfield, and even a utility guy based solely on quality or unique names in the minors. There are a few players that were drafted last year and got some time in short-season ball but have not yet played this season, they are included based on the assumption they will make a short-season team again this season.

Pitching Staff

Jose Jose – Jose (you choose whether I am referring to his first name or last name) is a pitcher in the Arizona Diamondbacks organization who spent 2013 between three different levels, topping out at Low-A South Bend. He is a decent reliever, having pitched the final out in 32 of the 80 games he has appeared in during his three year minor league career.

Buck Farmer – I don’t even know where to begin with Farmer’s name, except it is somewhere between a broadcaster’s dream and nightmare. While accidentally using the first letter of his last name to begin his first name could land a broadcaster without a job, the amount of puns available are endless. Farmer was drafted three times (2009, 20112, & 2013) before finally signing with the Detroit Tigers after being taken in the fifth round this past June. He started 11 games and struck out more than a batter an inning in the New York-Penn League.

Dakota Dill – This 26th round pick by the Atlanta Braves in 2013 found himself in 18 games, all in relief, in the Appy league and struck out 10.7 batters per nine. He transferred from the University of Houston to Sul Ross University after his sophomore year before being drafted by the Braves.

Bud Jeter – With Bud Selig and Derek Jeter both taking their farewell tours this season, it just makes sense to include a guy that combines both their names. After being selected in the 25th round of last year’s draft by the Arizona Diamondbacks, he made appearances at three different levels of the minors, topping out in the Midwest League.  His ERA last season was 6.00, but that came in large part due to back-to-back rough outings in which he gave up a combined 10 runs in just three innings.

Deiyerbert Bolivar – Bolivar was signed by the San Francisco Giants out of Venezuela as a 17-year old this international signing period. That is all I know about him, well that and Deiyerbert is a fun name to try and say.

June 17, 2012; Omaha, NE, USA; Stony Brook Seawolves second baseman

(8) catches the ground ball against the Florida State Seminoles during the second inning of game five of the 2012 College World Series at TD Ameritrade Park. Mandatory Credit: Bruce Thorson-USA TODAY Sports

Infield

Catcher: Sicnarf Loopstok –  Loopstok won the 2013 Moniker Madness, as the next person did the year before, and who am I to argue with MiLB.com? Loopstok was drafted in the 13th round by the Cleveland Indians last season (it was a good draft for names) and got into 24 games in the New York-Penn League. He had a grand total of two extra base hits, a double and a triple, and had eight past balls in 18 games behind the plate. But hey, he will always have the Moniker Madness title and a spot on my All-Name Team.

First Base: Rock Shoulders – Another Moniker Madness champion, Shoulders is actually climbing through a system thanks to solid on-field production. He hit 18 home runs in 2013 for the Chicago Cubs Low-A affiliate, and is now in High-A and putting up the best OBP of his career. He was originally drafted in the 20th round out of high school by the Boston Red Sox in 2010, but decided to go to junior college instead, and slipped five rounds, but decided to sign with the Cubs in 2011. Shoulders is not on any prospect lists but he is certainly solid organizational depth for a team that has one of the best systems in all of baseball.

Second Base: Maxx Tissenbaum – Anytime a Maxx goes double-X, it is a good thing. Tissenbaum was traded from the San Diego Padres to the Tampa Bay Rays this off-season, and the Rays are trying him out at catcher rather than his natural position of second base. So far it is working out as he has thrown out two of the five would-be base-stealers, and is looking good with the bat early this season as well.

Third Base: Zelous Wheeler – Wheeler is in his 8th minor league season, fourth in Triple-A, and with his third organization. He has played 521 of his 771 minor league games at third base, and is off to a very hot start for Scranton/Wilkes-Barre. With Alex Rodriguez out all year and the New York Yankees aging infield an ongoing injury risk, Wheeler may not be a minor leaguer all season.

Shortstop: Erisbel Arruebarruena – When the Los Angeles Dodgers signed this Cuban shortstop this off-season, he immediately slid into shortstop on my all name team ahead of the Chicago Cubs Arismendy Alcantara. Arruebarruena has not yet made his minor league debut, and I am hoping to get a first hand look at him sometime in the next week or so, but from the video I have seen he is masterful with the glove and a disaster at the plate.

May 21, 2012; Worcester, MA, USA; A general view of Fitton Field prior to a game between the Worcester Tornadoes and the Quebec Capitales. Mandatory Credit: Mark L. Baer-USA TODAY Sports

Outfield & Utility Man

Outfield: Jiandido Tromp – Tromp is in his third season in the minor leagues and has a career OBP of under .300. The 20-year old Aruban can play a good defensive center field, but needs the bat to come around as he repeats the SALLY League.

Outfield: Amalani Fukofuka – Fukofuka is a center fielder in the Kansas City Royals system, and despite being at plenty of their spring and extended spring games, I have not yet noticed him. He is still just 18 and was drafted in the fifth round last year, so there is definitely some upside to his game. He did not put up impressive numbers in the Arizona League last summer, but he was almost three years younger than the average player in the league.

Outfield: Forrestt Allday – Allday was a an eighth round pick for the Boston Red Sox in 2013, and looked pretty good for the Lowell Spinners. Allday plays a solid center field and possesses good speed and a good arm, but his bat will be average at best. He has very little power, but has a god eye at the plate and should be able to stick in the organization for some time.

Utility: Torsten Boss – Boss was recently traded to the Cleveland Indians after being an 8th round pick by the Baltimore Orioles in 2012. Boss has played second, third, and outfield as he is now in his third minor league season. His value come in his position flexibility and approach at the plate as he will probably never provide more than fringe average power.